Do not repay anyone evil for evil, but take thought for what is noble in the sight of all. If it is possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.
- Romans 12:17-18
Retaliation is, by its very nature, fair. You hit me, I hit you back. You scream at me, I respond in kind. Everyone is treated the same.
That inherent fairness is probably why nobody has to teach children to retaliate when they’re provoked. When one of my kids yells at their sibling, it becomes a shouting match almost immediately. When somebody gets hit with a toy, it doesn’t take long for them to pick up that toy and strike back. Nobody taught them to respond like this—it’s just what feels right.
But while it may feel that way, I’ve observed something from my parental perspective: the fairness of retaliation leads to twice the tears. Nobody wins in a back-and-forth; everybody loses.
That’s why the gospel points us to a different response in times of conflict: not the fairness of retaliation, but the grace of peace. When believers are wronged, God calls us to look to a broader perspective than the one to which our sinful flesh defaults—instead of thinking about what’s best for you, the Holy Spirit compels you to think about what’s best for everyone.
It’s not an easy thing to turn the other cheek in a world
where lashing out is rewarded. But the crucified Christ is our model and the
risen Christ is our hope. In a world of anger, escalation, and violence, may Christians
be reminded of Jesus’s words: blessed are the peacemakers.
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